What if funny t-shirts had never been invented? What would pathetic, lonely assholes do to fulfill their rabid craving for attention from absolute strangers? Would they have to paint funny pictures and sayings directly on their naked chest. Would tattoo parlors be overwhelmed with pretentious hipsters having their bad jokes permanently engraved under their dermal layer. Would society collapse in a quivering mass of unamused, unoffended gelatinous goo. Thank goodness for funny t-shirts.
What if fraggle rock was still on the air. I wouldn't be an alcholic. Or alone. Or ugly. 911 never would have happened. Cause fraggle rock is the only thing that calms the terrorist urge in Muslims hating on the infidels. Damn you HBO.
What if we promoted suicide as a good solution to your problems. Wouldn't that be easier. Teenagers always do the opposite of what you tell them. And if a few do listen and kill themselves, screw it.